Messy Family Project
Perfect for
Parents
HOSTS
Alicia Hernon
Mike Hernon
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Catholic conversations on marriage and family. Offering encouragement, practical advice, and suggestions for parents on this messy adventure.
Parenting is not a clean-cut, simple process for those who like to follow the rules. Family life is messy and unpredictable, but it is the greatest adventure you will ever have. We are Mike and Alicia Hernon, parents of 10 children with a growing number of grandchildren, and we would like to invite you into some of the conversations we have had with each other about marriage, parenting, and Catholic family life. Our hope is that our conversation sparks a dialogue between you and your spouse that leads to greater unity and intentional Christian parenting in your home. Listen in to our podcast and start the conversation as we seek to lead our families to heaven.
Visit us at https:///www/MessyFamilyProject.org for resources, guides, links and show notes.
The strength of even the smallest children is more than we imagine, but it must have a free play in order to reveal itself” – Maria Montessori
Summary
This episode focuses on understanding toddlers not as problems to manage, but as persons in a critical state of development who are striving for independence and learning how to function in the world. Through a Montessori-informed and Catholic lens, Maggie Radzik explains that much of what parents label as “misbehavior” is actually a child’s natural growth process combined with limited emotional regulation. Her conversation with Mike and Alicia emphasizes that parents should shift from control to formation by observing their child, preparing an environment that supports success, and responding calmly—especially during tantrums, which are signs of overwhelm rather than defiance. The episode highlights that parenting toddlers is as much about the child’s formation as it is about the parents’ own growth in patience, humility, and intentionality, with a gentle reminder that even very young children can begin to encounter God through simple, peaceful experiences of faith.
Key Takeaways
Your toddler is not the problem – you are. You are being formed by them as you are taking on this parenting role!
Toddlers crave independence but they are easily overwhelmed. Create an environment for them to learn.
We need to allow the environment of the home to teach the child, but that means we need to slow down and observe them and see what they need.
To handle a tantrum, we need to stay calm and grounded and not take it personally.
Stop reacting and shift to being intentional about how you treat them. They are a person in progress!
Couple Discussion Questions
Where do we see our toddler striving for independence lately?
What situations seem to overwhelm our toddler most?
How do each of us typically respond to tantrums?
Where do we say “no” the most? Could we change the environment instead?
Resources
MFP Discipline Guide
MFP Blog: How to Survive the Toddler Years
